Defeated or Determined?

There are times in a person’s life – say mine, for instance….or yours – when you’ve made a decision to change something and very soon afterwards, temptation is at your door step, hand-delivering an excuse, with your status quo looking more appealing than ever. For instance, you decide to cut down or cut out sugar and your good friend and neighbor shows up on your doorstep with a cake exclaiming how excited she is about trying this new recipe and she’s dying to know what you think. Or, you decide to get back into a regular pilates routine and just as you are about to leave for class, a friend phones and wants to treat you to the movie you’ve been dying to see. Or, deciding to start a new job search to leave a stressful, unfulfilling one behind and your computer dies right there in front of you right along with your commitment. There are countless examples when life seems to challenge us in this way. It’s as if the universe is saying, “Really??? Are you sure you really want to do this? Change is so hard and wouldn’t it be easier if you just left things alone?” No. It wouldn’t be easier. I see situations like these as a “call to arms”. The so-called universe has pulled out all stops and so should you. It’s a time to list all the reasons you made the decision in the first place and then regardless of the initial obstacles, find a way to succeed. Graciously accept the cake, throw it in the trash, and lie to your friend about how good it was. (Just kidding. There are other options that don’t involve eating the cake, thus breaking your commitment, in case you lean more towards humble honesty.) Ask your friend if she can go to the movies another night. Make a list of the skills you do have and companies or industries you do want to investigate for your job search. The point is, you always have a choice. You’ve been given an opportunity to dig deep, see what you’re made of, and discover your own resourcefulness and dare I say, willpower. Don’t – I repeat don’t – see it as a reason to delay your start or a reason to not do it at all whatever the “it” is that was just challenged. This is not a sign to call it quits or that something isn’t meant to be. The direction of your life is determined by you and sometimes – many times – your success has moments of solidarity. It’s just you and you alone. None of us are as weak as we think so dig deep, find that inner strength, and press on. Betraying your own trust is far more damaging than almost anything else you can do.

For those who regularly read this blog, you may have noticed that nothing was posted last week. The reason is that my computer DID die right in front of me and then I had to go out of town. Despite those challenges and even now having a nasty cold, the blog is back up and running. For those with keen memories, you took notice this isn’t an interview with Joanna Nichols at Light of Hand Massage. That has been delayed but I do, with great intention, plan to post next Friday.

As always, feel free to email me with feedback, questions, or suggestions for topics that interest you. I can be reached at or contact Bria directly. Thank you for reading!

This blog pro­vides gen­eral infor­ma­tion and dis­cus­sion about med­i­cine, health and related sub­jects.  The words and other con­tent pro­vided in this blog, and in any linked mate­ri­als, are not intended and should not be con­strued as med­ical advice. If the reader or any other per­son has a med­ical con­cern, he or she should con­sult with an appropriately-licensed physi­cian or other health care worker.Never dis­re­gard pro­fes­sional med­ical advice or delay in seek­ing it because of some­thing you have read on this blog or in any linked materials. If you think you may have a med­ical emer­gency, call your doc­tor or 000 immediately.The views expressed on this blog and web­site have no rela­tion to those of any academic, hospital, practice or other insti­tu­tion with which the authors are  affiliated.


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